freaking out

I guess I am always freaking out though, so maybe this isn't news to anyone else! I am seriously disturbed about the sudden amount of gov't bailouts for financial institutions...seriously disturbed. I think the last thing we need is to bail out all these banks. It is just putting off the inevitable in my opinion. The business cycle is cyclical *ahem*. So why not let it work?! You can't always be going up! There will be a point when the market will correct itself. Yes, there are many things that can be done to push it off into the future...but is that a good idea? Not in my opinion. In fact, I think it is probably the worst possible idea ever. Instead of letting the market correct itself, we push it off into the future, which means eventually when the market does correct itself it will be that much worse.

I know that I am always talking about getting goats, being self sufficient and having my entire family live together, but it seems to me that maybe I am not as far off as I thought I was. Of course the blogs I read are all blogs that people are preparing for the "collapse," so maybe I am only seeing what I choose to see. But, I think that where we are as a country right now, the state of our economy, well, we need to really prepare and be ready for what comes next.

I have been trying to prepare for the past year and a half now, but I am no where near as ready as I should be, or even need to be for that matter. But, we are getting there. We have our woodstove and a huge pile of wood in our yard (which I am concerned about people stealing, of course). I am preserving food, we have the pig coming in November, our summer CSA has another month to go, and then our winter CSA starts up.

There are major concerns. What happens if Matt loses his job? What if my mom can't work? My brother and his wife? It's a constant concern of mine. I know, worrying is a sin, and it's the sin that I have the hardest time not doing. Maybe I am not worrying as much as I think, maybe I actually am trying to prepare and be responsible just in case something happens. Or maybe I am making excuses for worrying :-)

I don't know what the future holds, no one does, but I just hope that I can prepare enough so that my family is safe and secure. That is the only thing that matters, that my family is safe.

PS I'm not always this much of a downer :-)

salsa

I have successfully canned salsa! I am so excited right now I can't even explain it. I have never canned a single thing in my life. I am all about the freezer baby. But, last Christmas, my brother and sister-in-law bought me a bunch of canning supplies (which I have wanted to try out so badly), so here I am canning my first batch of salsa. OK, so it is a little watery at the bottom, but that's because I didn't drain the tomatoes. I figured why bother, it will make more salsa, and I don't mind if it is a little watery. All I have to do is shake it up before I use it, or stirring might be a little safer :-) I canned 6 pints, which is probably not enough to get me through football season, but we will savor it. Unfortunately, I didn't get nearly as many tomatoes as I did last year. We still have some, but I plan to use those to make sauce over the next couple of weeks, and of course to put in our salads (is anyone else getting as much lettuce in their CSA's this year? or gardens???).




Matt and I took Emma apple picking this past weekend. It was great. We picked a bushel of apples in about 30 minutes, and all in one row. I think Emma really enjoyed it. She really loves being outside. We forgot the camera though, so we are planning on going back to stage some photos ;-) And maybe pick some more apples...who knows. I plan to make applesauce and apple jelly out of the apples. I'm very excited about this whole canning experience...although...it did take me just about the entire day to do those 6 pints of salsa. Between a teething baby who hates to have a wet diaper (the downside to cloth diapers) and trying to make sure I get everything perfectly measured (I have read some horror stories about bad canning), I think I did pretty well :-)

winter eating

I am excited to say that we have put a deposit on half a pig for the fall. And we have also paid for a winter CSA which will allow us to continue our local eating through the winter into the spring. Very exciting stuff. I think that half a pig will end up being around 75-90 lbs. That seems like quite a bit of pork, but over a year I think it will be just enough. I'm also thinking of buying some chickens from Snafu, where I normally get my meat. It is a lot of money up front, but it works out to way less than when I am buying the food at the grocery store each week. We have narrowed down our shopping to just needing to buy dairy at the grocery store, and occasionally eggs when we can't get them from the farm. I'm happy with that :-)

The pig is coming from Thirty Acre Farm in Whitefield. They are certified organic and just let the pigs run around in the woods looking for grubs. There are a ton of pictures on their website and the pigs look happy, so that makes me happy.

Our winter CSA is coming from Buckwheat Blossom Farm. And the brochure says "November through March, come to the farm twice a month to pick-up a variety of root storage crops, greens, leeks, onions, garlic, winter squash, potatoes, and frozen veggies such as corn, peppers, green beans, and broccoli." Sounds good to me! That leaves 2 months where we wouldn't be getting food from the farm. And hopefully we will have stored enough to not really worry too much about it...although I'm not sure that is a reality. This farm also sells meat, you can buy half a cow, or pigs, or turkeys, chicken, and lamb. It's amazing to me what is around here. I never realized it until I found the local harvest website, and started doing the One Local Summer last year. I can't really think about going back to the way things used to be...

This weekend we are going to go apple picking which I am very excited about. I see lots of applesauce and apple jelly in my future :-)

writer's block

Have you ever felt the intense desire and need to write? I have that right now, but guess what, I can't think of one blessed thing to write about. I don't know if all of my creativity has been lost, or what the real issue is. I have tons of thoughts in my head, but I can't seem to get them down on paper. Why not? It is pretty frustrating to say the least. I think that sometimes I feel like I am completely lost in my mind and can't express what I need to. Not to say that I am losing my mind :-) So no worries there!

My update on life is going to have to suffice for the time being. My garden is pretty much done I think. I am going to start pulling all the green tomatoes to try and ripen them in the house, and then get rid of everything else. I'd like to dig up part of the yard and get it ready for next year's garden as well, but since I don't have any time to actually do that...I'm not sure it will get done...maybe though :-)

We have our wood stove, and I am extremely happy about that. We still need to build the chimney. Matt is going back and forth on whether to take down the old chimney and build a new one in it's place, or to just put a pipe up through the house...I am opting for the pipe, easier, cleaner, and less expensive. Not sure if it is the best long term solution though. Matt is still working on the upstairs as well. He edged the entire apartment this weekend, so now we just need to finish priming and then paint...or maybe we will just leave the primer as the paint. I don't know. I want to get the place rented, and if it takes too much longer, I'm afraid we won't have a renter for the winter.

I think that all of these concerns are why I can't write, because I keep thinking about money and all that that entails. Someday I will learn to just let go of all of the worldly decisions and trust God, but it hasn't happened yet, and I am not feeling too confident about it happening ever at this point. Awful thing to say, I know, but I haven't learned how to not worry yet. If anyone has any pointers, they would be greatly appreciated.

I've been trying to de-clutter my life. We have so much "stuff" in the house. I don't even know if we actually need it all. I have a hard time throwing things away, like christmas cards, birthday cards, letters etc. I have a lot of "memory" boxes, and can't seem to part with those things. Yet, they continue to clutter my house and my life. I could definitely go through the house and get rid of everything that we don't need/use, but I know as soon as the trash man takes it away, I will want it all back. Maybe I will go nuts today and throw everything away. I am in a cleaning mood...

OK, well that is about all for now. I will eventually write something interesting, I promise, but for now I need to de-clutter and organize.