the art of not blogging consistently

OK, so clearly I haven't held up my side of the bargain...blogging more frequently. I feel like I have a good excuse. I am pregnant, I can barely put two coherent thoughts together right now :-) I am hoping that this little baby wants to come out soon though, because her mama is getting slightly impatient. I am kind of on bed rest...well...if I do too much I swell to the size of a large elephant, and then it ends up taking me at least 3 hours to deflate a bit. Figures. I have gained way more weight than any normal person should during pregnancy. OK, so it hasn't been nearly that bad. I mean, I didn't have any morning sickness! Severe back pain, yes, contractions since 24 weeks...sure...but no morning sickness!

So I'm not working now. And I think that is a good thing. I think that my body was really telling me to stop. I have had fewer contractions in the past couple weeks, and that makes me happy, of course now I want the contractions to be coming on nice and strong...unfortunately not happening. But what do I do when I don't work? Well, let's see...I go on the internet. I don't just go on the internet for entertainment news anymore...ahhh the naivety of a previous life. Nope, now I am on the internet researching everything bad in the world. I have become some crazy extremist I believe. I think that it must be partially hormonal though.

Since last year I have spent a lot of time researching the relocalization of food, peak oil, being kinder to the environment. I'm sure everyone that has read this blog actually sees what a struggle it has been for me. Yet, now, I am starting to freak out even more. It seems like everything I have been spewing off to my co-workers and friends and family about food shortages etc. really is happening. Yesterday I heard that Costco and Sam's Club are both limiting (rationing) the amount of rice you can buy. But, they assure us there is no shortage of rice. That I don't understand. Then this morning...the Wall Street Journal posts an article about how it is time to start stockpiling food. Yeah...that is bad. The Wall Street Journal? It is a publication that I find truly unbiased, which is nice considering I am a conservative republican baptist green mama. :-)

See I don't think that the media is treating this in the best way at all. All week the Today show has talked about the rising food prices and the shortages that we are starting to have. This causes people to panic and stockpile food, which causes shortages and prices to go up. That is not going to help us. Instead, I wish that the media actually gave ideas how to deal with these types of problems. Yes, it is good to prepare for a disaster, but not everyone all at once. Gradually, over time, is what is needed. Instead, I think that they need to get into information about how to grow some of your own food. How it is important to eat seasonal local food and stop relying on food from California. I mean, I live in Maine, we produce quite a bit of food in Maine. Potatoes for one thing, it is a huge crop for the northern part of our state. Yes, I can find Maine potatoes at the grocery store, but more often than not they are buried under the Idaho potatoes...is there a reason we need Idaho potatoes when we produce plenty in Maine as it is? Maybe we don't actually produce enough potatoes in Maine to feed the state, but I would expect we do. And another thing, maple syrup...we have plenty of Maine made maple syrup, yet, it is most likely overpowered on the shelves by the stuff from Vermont. Why is that? OK, so these are probably petty examples...but I don't get it.

I am so thankful that we are joining the CSA this year. I think it is going to be a very difficult summer with buying food from the grocery store...oil prices are through the roof, gas prices keep going higher and higher. What is next? I am seriously concerned about bringing my daughter into this world, and how we are going to provide for her. (this is where the hormones come in) So Matt works an hour away from our house...that is 50 miles...so 100 miles a day on the car, that is filling up twice a week. At least our little yaris gets good gas mileage. But, at what point is it not worth it anymore? When do we sell everything and move into an apartment? OK, we have a ways to go before that would need to happen. It is still a concern though. Do we sell the other car? Try and pay down some of our debt? Well Dave Ramsey would say absolutely...and so would I. But, how do you sell all of this stuff in a time of economic downturn? Part of me feels guilty unloading our possessions on someone else who may not really realize what is going on. At the same time, having less debt is always a plus.

We are looking into getting a wood stove...and also turning part of the upstairs of our house into a studio apartment. It might be able to help us with the oil prices next year. I keep telling my brother and sister-in-law to move in with us. No one listens to me though, and really, I'm kind of crazy, so I'm sure they want to stay as far away from us as possible. I have been talking about a commune, get some cute little goats and chickens and have a community living experience with the rest of my family. It may eventually come to that. Maybe it won't. And will my poor husband be able to keep up with me and all my craziness? Who knows :-) I'm hoping that things just all of a sudden become clear to me and soon, because I feel like I am going in circles and am at a stand still as to what I should do next.

For the time being I am planning on getting all of my jars ready for a major canning extravaganza this summer/fall, and hopefully I will be able to preserve a lot of what we receive from the CSA. Other than that, it is trying to figure out how to afford to install a wood stove in a house with no working chimney, and how to afford to finish fixing up the upstairs of the house so it is livable. Then I can work on calming myself down a bit...I do know that God will always provide for me, but sometimes not knowing how is the worst part for any person to deal with.